mylife.com dun mind me its depressing

Really...
Even when I find a job for a month it end up like that, so without it it's even worst. 
It's kinda the first day of summer holiday today with my siblings and I at home, and of course I'm the one that take all the blame, on my back, since my mom won't say it to my face directly >> my brother is young and spend his day saying he's bored, and my sis is dumb and failed all her exam since junior high, but since I have my degree and she's lost cause, I am the only one that have to get a job on every damn moment of my free time and get blamed if I don't. 
Looser, good for nothing, deadbeat, failure, I'm gonna be called names everyday till september, hourray >>
I am supposed to do one productive thing a day >> she doesn't even do it herself how I am supposed to do that...
Not as if they claim half of my scholarship and already planned to decorate their new house with my salary if ever I remain here once I'll have my master and found a job... 

The new thing my mom throw at me is "Why you're not even rich yet with your drawing ? You should pay your daily expense with it!" as if she knew anything about drawing and value *sigh*
Only way I can make money in between my tutoring is by drawing, if I get money through commish I could at least have a reason so she doesn't throw me out of the house so I'd do "something outside", I think she doesn't understand that it isn't because I'm in my room most of the time that I do nothing *sigh*
I still think I shocked her when I told her there are some people on here I'm friend with for 7 years... not even sure she believed me.
Anyway... Gonna be harsh holidays... I don't even have rl friends to see or go out with >> (my closest friend is gonna make a tour of european capital with her boyfriend a big part of summer...) 
Still 10 weeks to go.

-3 days later-
Now I'm being called good for nothing worm in front of family's friend, next what ? she'll tell how useless I am in her eyes to complete stranger ? 
She yelled at my brother who wanted to help by cleaning the windows not so greatly but he tried his best, just great >>
Not as if yesterday it was my brother's birthday and my father threw a tantrum saying birthday was bullshit and a 9 yo kid shouldn't need it to be celebrated anymore, he prevented my mother to come eat the cake with us and we had to keep quiet and eat head low.
Still 10 weeks to go. (And two years of being treated like shit hourray)